I read somewhere that swearing helps to reduce pain when we hurt ourselves, for example when we stub a toe. So I've started replacing your name with 'fuck', and I'm not going to lie, I feel a lot better.

I was so undeserving.
And yet, you were
So relentless.

I pushed, you pulled.
I cried, you comforted.
I stopped, you smiled.

I was a disaster,
The worst of its kind.

And yet, you still
Had the audacity
To tell me
I was beautiful.


-JB

The Lovers and the Dreamers

The lovers and the dreamers,

Asleep at 3 a.m.

On a mattress on the floor. 

Oblivious to the world turning.

The lovers and the dreamers,

Sharing coffee at 8 a.m.

Over hazy eyes and light 

Catching the dust in the air.

The lovers and the dreamers,

Kissing goodbye at 9:30 a.m.

Their breath visible between

The touching of their lips.

The lovers and the dreamers,

Coming through the door at 6 p.m.

Drinking too much wine

That’s meant for the chorizo.

The lovers and the dreamers,

Falling into bed at 9 p.m.

A tangled mess of limbs and sheets

Falling asleep in each other’s arms.

The lovers and the dreamers,

Are asleep at 3 a.m.

They will begin again,

In the morning.

Second Chances

I'm running out of people to believe in.

The voices scream "Second Chance,"

But I need a reason to begin.

I spent so much damn time

Just keeping my head above water,

I forgot I knew how to swim.

The man on that corner said, 

"Don't save I love you for tomorrow."

But what good are sweet words

When there's nothing else to follow.

I can't say exactly what it is I'm feeling,

But I've never been in this place before.

I'm trying to get out, kicking and screaming,

But you've got your back to the door.

My curse is my admiration,

But yours is so much worse.

You and your damn indecision,

You're not the man I thought you were.

When you left my mother told me,
"It'll be okay, the world keeps turning."
But that's the problem.
I told you I would love you
Until the earth stopped spinning.

A Letter To The Man I Love

I too often over-complicate reality. I over analyze your words and actions, forgetting that you are a simple man and that love is a simple thing. I get jealous without meaning to, I yearn for your attention like a toddler, and I doubt myself much more often than I care to admit. But you take it all in stride, showing me nothing but patience and understanding. You never raise your voice or get irritated with me… or at least you never show it. You are the biggest constant in my life, and I am grateful everyday that I have you to lean on. I admire your work ethic, your passion, and most of all your heart. You inspire me every day to be a better version of myself. You make me so proud, and so happy to have you in my life. You have seen the best of me and the worst of me, and still choose both every time. You are my partner in crime, my midnight companion. Someone who knows when I am smiling, even in the dark.

I’m scared of falling in love.
I lose myself.
I’m so malleable in love
That I become completely distorted from my reality.
I forget who I am
And who I was before him.
I don’t want to fall in love,
But I love you so completely.